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View ArticleClosing Distance: Personal Space and Body Alarm Response
Yesterday morning while stopping at a gas station to put air in my tire, I was approached by a stranger. The first words out of his mouth were to ask “if I was from around here,” immediately sending me into condition orange.
It’s interesting to note that this happened just a day after I sat through a CHL (Concealed Handgun License) renewal class, where we got into a good discussion during the class about muggings, vehicle thefts and how you’d react during those situations.
We all have our preconceived notions of how we’d react in a violent encounter, but the truth is that we’ll never truly know until we’re put in that exact situation.
Cooper Color Code
I’d like to explain my statement earlier about condition orange and provide a brief example of the Cooper Color Code here for reference. We’ve previously mentioned Colonel Jeff Cooper here on ITS, in regard to his carry conditions and firearm safety rules, but he is also known for advocating a color code to describe a person’s state of mind. Not so much in regards to a level of alertness, but purely the mental state.
The following comes from his book, Principles of Personal Defense:
- Condition White – You are unprepared and unready to take lethal action. If you are attacked in White you will probably die unless your adversary is totally inept.
- Condition Yellow – You bring yourself to the understanding that your life may be in danger and that you may have to do something about it.
- Condition Orange – You have determined upon a specific adversary and are prepared to take action which may result in his death, but you are not in a lethal mode.
- Condition Red – You are in a lethal mode and will shoot if circumstances warrant.
Condition Orange is definitely what my body kicked into when presented with this stranger that approached me in the parking lot of the gas station. I’d like to explain one more principle of what occurred to me though, before going into the rest of the story.
Body Alarm Response
The body alarm response is what naturally happens to your body during an elevated state of awareness and the adrenaline dump that comes along with it. This is typically referred to as “fight or flight,” but more appropriately described as BAR.
During a body alarm response, the characteristics exhibited are rapid heart beat and it’s counterpart, rapid breathing; tingling of the extremities, degradation in fine motor skills, tunnel vision and that sinking sensation in your stomach. You should embrace these characteristics as your body’s early warning system and be glad they’re working, not let them control you and succumb to the “fear” you might think this means.
As blood is drawn into your core from your extremities (that tingling sensation and possibly numbness), you may recall the smallest of details during this heightened level of awareness. Blood being drawn away is also what can cause loss of fine motor skills, which aren’t as “fine” as you might expect. Check out this article on ITS for more on the loss of fine motor skills.
There are ways to control body alarm response through, meaning that through training and preparing yourself, you can mitigate it’s effects. One of the most powerful training tools is embracing it.
My Experience
Now back to my story. What happened is, as I was walking inside to get change for the air pump at the gas station, I was approached by a cleanly-dressed stranger. He had come from the direction of a nicer vehicle that was parked alongside the convenience store building of the gas station. I immediately assumed that it was his vehicle, but I quickly flipped through a memory of just a few seconds ago where I’d noticed him floating around a gas pump.
As he approached my path to the convenience store entrance, my plan was to ignore him and keep walking inside. This plan quickly went out the window, as he encroached rapidly while asking the question, “are you from around here?” That particular question, along with the quick approach into my personal space, immediately sent me into condition orange.
My first reaction, even before answering him was to look at his hands and start walking backwards. I’m actually really proud of myself, as this is what I’ve been over and over with in my head, “watch their hands, watch their hands.” I’ll ding myself on walking backwards rather than stopping prior to when I did, but I think a lot of that is how we realistically encounter people every day.
In a perfect world, I’d like to say that I follow the 21 ft. rule, which was highlighted by an article in SWAT Magazine in 1983 called How Close is Too Close? In that article, it states that a healthy adult male can cover the distance of 7 yards (about 21 ft.) in 1.5 seconds. Coincidently, the study also showed that took about 1.5 seconds to draw a sidearm and put two rounds center mass on a human-size target at 7 yards.
You make that quickly approaching adult male an armed attacker and you can see why it’s called the 21 ft. rule. Realistically, we allow people within this 21 ft. perimeter each and every day; for me this day was no exception.
Putting distance between myself and this stranger was also something I was proud of, although moving backwards is never a good thing. Just like the guy in the movie Snatch say, “whenever you’re in reverse, things come from behind you.”
As I put distance between myself and the stranger I answered yes to his question. At this point he continued to approach with his hands down by his side, while stating “Do you know if there’s a Petsmart around…” I cut into his statement, putting up my left hand and saying “Just wait right there and I’ll answer your question.” My right hand also moved backwards towards my gun. I never placed my hand on it, or gave away its position, I was just cognizant of where I was moving my hand to.
His immediate response was to put both his hands up and say “Ok, I was just trying to find the Petsmart… I found the Petco, I just can’t find the Petsmart.” By now I think he realized that I didn’t like him invading my personal space and he finally seemed aware of me putting distance between us.
I gave him some simple directions to Petsmart, but was very short with him, continuing to watch his body position. After he said thanks for the directions, he turned around and walked off as I walked closer to the building’s door. I noticed him walk right past the car I had assumed belonged to him and round the corner behind the building. After getting change for the air pump, I exited the building.
Ensuring to keep my head on a swivel all the way back to the air pump, I didn’t see the stranger again. I brushed off the encounter until I was back in my vehicle and on the road. It was then I really took stock of what happened and the indicators that warranted my elevated condition. I truly feel that my actions prevented me from becoming a victim, or at least made me appear to be a hard target. I think the stranger was up to no good and my reaction to his closing distance made him rethink his battle plan.
I wanted to share my story with you today, because I think it helps to reinforce how important it is to listen to your body and an example of how your conditioning can take over, even when you don’t plan for it to. I think that If I hadn’t mentally rehearsed this scenario thousands of times in my head and been exposed to it during my training, the outcome would have been dramatically different.
If you’ve got a similar story to share, post it in the comments, I’d be interested to hear of situations like this that might have happened to you.
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138 Comments
Have used and taught the Tueller drill for many years now, still love the look of surprise on people’s faces when you make it too them with the rubber knife in short time. Teaches that reaction time is something you need to focus on, not just being a good shot. Bravo!
Ed Taylor
Crew Leader
Thanks for the annecdote. I’m in crowded urban settings on a daily basis, and presenting as the hard target is often the only defense from predatory individuals.
so, this is a story of being asked directions, which caused you to reach for your gun, and be harsh with a stranger, despite his offering no threatening behaviour whatsoever. What a sorry state of affairs. Good luck…
Sorry you see it that way, but it’s how I reacted to someone rapidly invading my personal space. And I didn’t reach for my gun, I was just ready to if needed.
You could dismiss this as a story about hyper-vigilance, or you could go macro/micro and come away with a better understanding of your behavior–and that of others. I think that’s the take-away. (Oh, and I, like others, have heard the color codes and FoF and other terms without knowing their history or meaning–this article is a good rollup of that info).
If you don’t assess your reactions to seemlingly mundane situations that stop short of force, someone else is likely to get the last word in that once-in-a-lifetime situation that doesn’t. Might be a jury, a dirtbag or a coroner. ESPECIALLY important if you are in lawful possession of a firearm, but just as relevant in a situation where you may be processing a BAR and weighing less-lethal but nonetheless ethically and legally complex options.
Me, I HATE gas stations….
It’s being vigilant in seemingly normal situations that keeps you from being a statistic. No one walks up to you and says “I’m going to attack you”. The author did nothing wrong and presented no weapon. He stopped a complete stranger that was rapidly encroaching on his personal space in an unsecured environment. When was the last time someone asked you for directions at punching distance while still moving in somewhere as confined as a gas station? For that matter, who the hell shops for pet food in the early morning?
Better yet. Lets say that that man was FOR SURE going to attack or mug the author. What would the attacker have done differently? Seems like rapidly approaching someone while asking a seemingly innocuous question to momentarily confuse and stifle before attacking and mugging is a fantastic option.
Bryan kept his head on and avoided a potentially bad situation. To everyone watching he did nothing but back up and tell a stranger to keep their space.
Way to keep cool and stay collected Bryan
Maybe I’m just too naive and trusting. I generally enjoy reading the various articles on ITSTactical, but your reactions in this story seem a bit over the top to me. Your description of the story does not send off any warning sirens in my head but like I said, that’s me being the naive one. Maybe the “you had to be there” details are not fully intact. How close was he when you stopped him? What if he would have taken one step closer, would you have drawn your weapon? Surely he would have stopped dead in his tracks then, but in a situation that to me would not require a weapon it would reflect poorly on gun owners and perpetuate the “vigilante” stereotype.
Thanks for your feedback Curtis. I do think that had someone approached you in the manner that this guy did, it would have been hard to not get a warning sign. He was literally arms length when I stopped him and started moving backwards. Guess I missed relaying that detail. I don’t think I would have drawn my gun if he would have taken a step closer, but I would have verbally warned him loudly to stay where he was at. Now if he would have presented a weapon it would have been a different story, but this is why my hand was ready but not anywhere near to drawing my gun.
It’s also easy to say that the situation didn’t warrant a gun reading an after action report like this and I would agree with you in this situation. As I said, I felt that the way I handled it prevented it from escalating and who knows what this guy might have had tucked in his waistband within easy reach.
Also, in Urban settings the 21ft rule might as well be a mile because there’s no way you’re going to avoid being within 21ft of people.
Which I mentioned in the article. All of us come within 21 feet of plenty of people each day, it’s hard to avoid.
Bryan, was this at a gas station on 287? I had a very very similar situation occur on Monday but I wasn’t carrying on my person (in my vehicle) because I had just left crossfit. I completely ignored him and never gave him my full back. He said, “hey buddy” sharply a few times but I didnt respond. I hung out in the store looking at beer even though I was there for water, until he walked outside.
Just curious as to where this happened to you.
Thanks for the input and reminder to stay on top of situational awareness.
Hey brother, actually it was off 287. So you were in the store when he was talking to you?
I was walking from the pump into the store when he first said something. Initially, I didn’t know if he was talking to me, but as soon as I heard “hey buddy” I realized it was directed at me. I didn’t look at him directly, but I kind of broadened my eyesight (if that makes sense) to see his angle and judge whether or not I could make it to the door before he caught up. I’m like you in that I’ll use firm commands to try get people to stop (especially when people approach me while I’m sitting in the truck with my seatbelt on), but since I wasn’t carrying and was completely fatigued. I just wanted to make it inside before him, avoid conflict (Krav Maga rule 1), and reassess.
It would certainly be interesting if it was the same guy. Broadening your eyesight makes perfect sense… I very much go out of my way to avoid conflict as well and this was one of those rare situations when I moved past the point of being able to avoid the situation at hand.
I had a situation a few months ago that put me into defense mode. For a little background I live in a town of about 15k people, with many being college students. The area is also fairly liberal where people really go out of their way to try and be polite but at the same time items of self-defense are frowned on.
Anyway I was in the local Co-Op in the afternoon when it was pretty busy and I had just stopped into grab a few things so I could get some cash-back to pay my barber across the street. I grabbed my tea and an apple and went to get in line and as I was walking up to the shortest line I noticed a guy who kinda sorta seemed like he might be trying to decide if he wanted to get in the line I was heading for but couldn’t seem to make up his mind or he was looking at the magazine rack. Since I couldn’t tell I just hopped in line.
He quickly fell in behind me and I could hear him muttering under his breath something about me being rude. I simply ignored it and waited in line patiently. As I waited the cashier was talking with the two ladies in front of me, being polite and asking about their day as he did his job. The man behind me started muttering “oh why don’t you just strike up a conversation, just take your time” among other off-hand comments. My alarm bells went off telling me that there was something not right about this guy and there was no way I’m giving him my back. I positioned myself so I could at least see him with my peripheral vision but I usually kept an eye on him. I kept an eye on him as the two women in front of me were each helped and left and he continued to behave strangely and make his comments about the state of things in the line. Once I got to the cashier he greeted me politely and was talking with me and occasionally looked at the strange man that was near me as I could tell his spider senses had gone off as well. Then the man raised up both his arms to his sides and pumped them outward on either side of his body towards both myself and the shopper behind him. With his hand coming so close to my face I finally spoke to him and said “keep you hands out of my face.” His reply was that “I need my space.” After I told him he had plenty of space, which he did for a shopping line, he got a little more aggressive and told me that I had been eyeballing him since he had come in the store which I found ridiculous but said nothing about. The cashier was clearly getting nervous and as he was giving me my change the guy stuck his hands in his pockets and pulled out a folding knife with the blade still closed and in his fist. As soon as I saw this I pivoted a little more and put my hand on my cold steel XL Espada that I happened to be carrying. Needless to say mine was bigger. As soon as the guy had grabbed his knife my senses had been even more elevated than they had before. As I was considering pulling my knife if he made any sudden movements my tunnel vision opened up and I remembered the small children, elderly, and other shoppers. No one else was even aware that the gentleman across from me had pulled a knife, not even the cashier. As the cashier finally finished giving me my change I kept my eye on the guy and back out the front door which I was right next to so I could diffuse the situation and not risk anyone around me getting hurt, myself getting hurt, or ending up hurting this guy who I could pretty clearly tell from the beginning had some psych issues.
That was the end of my event for the moment and I actually came back after getting my haircut to inform the manager (who happened to be a fellow shooter) about what had transpired. To my pleasant surprise they were actually reviewing the tape as this man had caused problems before. I made a few mistakes but I also learned some lessons and more importantly than that no one had been hurt. I don’t think I could ask for much more than that.
Good story Brian and good on you for catching him drawing a knife. It was definitely a good decision to leave yours sheathed, what happened as you left? Was the knife still in his hand? I would have personally had a hard time just leaving without informing someone after I’d see something like that. There’s certainly nothing illegal about him holding a closed pocket knife in his hand, but when you put the other things on top of that it changes things.
Glad you did go back to alert the manager after that though. Thanks for sharing!
I don’t completely remember if I saw him pocket the knife or not so I can’t say either way. The reason I left without saying anything, and believe me I did think about having not said anything later, is that I could clearly tell that for whatever reason I was the main cause of this guy getting worked up. For that reason I felt if I left the situation would be diffused and he would relax. I think he quickly went into his own condition orange when he picked up that I was paying attention to him and by me leaving it allowed him to calm down. I didn’t feel he was a threat to anyone but me at the time. Like I said though, I made some mistakes and with 20/20 I’d have notified someone. Also for some reason I had forgot my phone because I definitely considered calling the cops. Not notifying someone immediately was my biggest mistake. I did however learn from it.
Talking about being at Orange alert. I have had a similar sistuation at a gas station where a guy by the entrance puts his hand out like we where supposed to give him something. My mother, wife and kids where with. left the wife and baby in the car (locked) and took my 4yr old in to use the bathroom. The guy follows us in and keeps eyeing me up. At the time i hadn’t got my conceal carry permit so i had a pocket knife. while my mom was in line to buy a pop the guy gets right behind her, real close to her purse. it looked like he was about to grab and run with her purse. He kept looking at me and back away when i made eye contact with him. Then i took out my pocket knife and acted like i had a sliver i was trying to pull out (dumb i know). But he immediately got out of line and left the store.
A month later at the same gas station the guy is there again, sticking out his hand as if asking for something. I observe from in the car. A lady walks out the store, he grunts and sticks out his hand and the lady walks by unnoticing. She digs thru her purse in her car, pulls out a buck and some change, gets out and says “here Alfred get yourself a soda’.
Just wanted to add that now in the LE world they’re starting to teach 30 ft rather then 21. The theory is even if you pop the bad guy within that 21 ft, you’ll still get cut (unless you hit the light switch).
I was actually just noticing that in the posts, im Mil LE and they started teaching us that just recently
I’ve been in LE for six years now, there of those as a Defensive Tactics Instructor and on the SWAT team. It’s good that you hit on the hands, hands kill (unless your Chuck Norris). Always watch the hands and look at what thier focus is on. Are the watching you to see if your an easy target? Are they looking at that shiny new watch you have or that IPad you just put in your back pack? In most urban settings though, the 21ft rule can’t be applied. So what I reccomend and used is try to put an obstacle in thier path to buy you some time.
My personal experience with this is that I responded to a suicidal subject that had chased after people in parking lot of a mental health clinic trim attempt to recive treatment. I was the first officer on scene and my back up was a few minutes away. I parked about 50 yards away from the subject and approached him. I could see that he had cut himself badly and that he was armed with a fairly large blade (over 4″). As I got closer to the subject I would make sure that I kept a vehicle, preferably a small passenger car between me and the subject while spoke to him to calm him down. My thinking was that if he wanted to fight he would have had to run around the car to attack, which would provide me plenty of time to use my less lethal/lethal options.
Luckily, once my backup arrived he deployed a shotgun with bean bag rounds and the subject was taken into custody without incident. Though 95% of the readers won’t have backup officers responding to thier aid, remember to watch a persons hands and try to determine where there focus is.
There are a ton of other things I can hot on, but my thumbs are getting tired on this iPhone after my CrossFit WOD! Thanks ITS!
I had an issue that definitely threw me into alert, and taught me a lesson about always carrying. I was driving across country with my two dogs to visit my family. It is a HUGE drive, so we were going to do it with a nap or two along the way. I stopped at an IHOP parking lot at about 2am. They are open all night, the parking lot was well lit, and it was well trafficked. I also always travel with my Glock 22. However, the Glock was in its case in the car, and I just needed to take the dogs out for a quick pee. I walked maybe 50-75 feet from my car to a grassy area next to a closed strip mall (same parking lot as the IHOP, but nobody was in this area). I actually work as a dog trainer, so I have pretty good dogs, and I think that may have saved my life.
While the kids were having a pee (and we’d been standing there a good three minutes), a transient male came out of the shadows, carrying a plastic bag. I hadn’t really noticed him, exhausted as I was from driving all day, and I immediately had alarms go off. He was staring at me, like STARING at me. I’m only 5’5, 125 and this was a full-sized adult male. I kept it cool, made eye contact, and then he started getting crazy. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing out here?! You had better hold on to those fucking dogs or I’m going to cut their fucking throats.” He then pulled out a large fixed blade knife and brandished it at us from a distance of maybe 15 feet. “Those dogs come anywhere near me and I’ll fucking kill them. You fucking people need to learn some control.” I calmly held the dogs and said, “We’re just having a bathroom break. Everything is good.” The ENTIRE time this was going on, my dogs were staring this guy down, calmly, but alertly. I have an 80lb Rottweiler and a little 40 lb Dalmatian X. Thankfully, after years of training, my Rottie waits for Mom to be upset before he gets upset, and his little sister does whatever he does. The guy walked past us, knife pointed at us the entire time, muttering to himself. We watched him until he was out of site, went back to the car, grabbed the gun (idiot!) and moved the car in a bit.
I have always been one of those people who tend to remain calm in bad situations and am pretty proud of myself that I kept my cool. The whole time this was going on I was thinking of something my defensive tactics instructor said, “If you are going to get into a knife fight, expect to be cut.” I was readying myself for the attack, focusing on his movements, expecting that the dogs would distract him while I went for the knife and sensitive areas. The dogs aren’t weapons, in case anyone was going there. Those are my furkids, and like hell if I’m going to let some whackjob hurt them. The gun went with me everywhere after that.
Being a former correction officer I always am looking at everything. I notice things most will never see because they are wrapped up in their little world. I learned to play the what if game. What if he shanks this guy, what if he try’s to shank me. Inside your personal space is NOT 21 feet. This is why I carry in my front pocket, so if I feel the need I can put hands on my weapon without anyone knowing. I have never gotten to “orange” out in public, but I do believe it is because of all watching and being aware of what is going on around me.
My wife had an orange moment several Christmas’ ago. We were meeting up after work at the local big mall to get dinner. She was up on the parking deck adajcent to several external entrance stores and a car behind her was flashing his lights and ‘gently’ honking. She continued and found a spot. The vehicle angled in behind her and the driver got out. She was unarmed at the time with both kids in the car but she cracked the window to see what he needed.
The other driver was dressed in work clothes and was trying to convince her that something in the front left wheel well was broken, that he saw ‘sparks’ etc. She went from orange to REALLY orange as he continued to verbally coax her out of the car to see this ‘thing’. She had already dialed 911. He hoofed it. She then called me and I made my way out of the resturant where I was waiting and linked up with the police and mall security. Descriptions were given and we went on to dinner…although it was a tense dinner.
Interesting thing was she had just finished reading ‘The Gift of Fear” and noted afterwards that she knew immediately that something was up and made mention of going ‘orange’ somewhere in the interaction.
alls well that ends well
I hate to say it, but we currently live in a world where its better to make yourself aware of potential threats rather than risk falling victim to some scumbag. Unfortunately we see stories every day regarding innocent people having their worlds torn apart by some selfish criminal…stories of elderly WW2 vets having their wife rape and murdered in front of him…stories of family friends abducting a mother and three daughters in the middle of the night, resulting in the death of the mother and at least one of the daughters, with the other two still missing. The world has absolutely gone to shit, and I would rather not trust anyone, than trust someone and have them take the ones I love on a ride through hell. I will definitely re-evaluate the way I interact with strangers in public…to me your story sounds like this guy was scouting for potential victims…why would he be walking around looking for a pet store first off…and for him to just walk off around the corner of the store seems odd. Who knows, you could have been airing up your tires and wound up with a knife to your neck or something.
I rarely ever pick up hitch hikers, but at one point years ago I had offered a ride to a man and his beagle, he was looking for a ride up north and was definitely not going to find a ride at the store he was at…I offered to take him about 5 miles down the road to where most of the truckers stop to fill up thinking he would have a better chance at finding a ride there. The guy seemed nice enough so I let him in and began making my way to the gas station. It was at that point when I realized the potential threat the man posed, and how easy it would have been for him to attack while I was driving. This put me into what you described as condition orange, making me much more aware of the man’s actions, the location of his hands, what his dog was doing in the back seat, etc. I’m sure the man actually posed no threat, but I could not help but thinking of how easy it would be for him to pull a knife and force me to the atm or something. Silly I know, and it sucks that we really can’t trust people…but like I said, I would rather be like that than become a victim.
One night when I was a grad student at the University of Illinois, I was walking down a street on the dangerous north edge of campus, known for its muggings and assaults. I was thinking about a physics problem and not paying much attention to my surroundings. Three young men approached me. One of them split off from the other two and walked ahead of them and past me. The other two spread across the sidewalk in front of me, blocking my way. The words “classic muggers triangle” flashed through my mind and I felt a great sense of disgust at myself for being so oblivious as to fall into such a trap.
I had thought about what to do if ever confronted with such a situation, and armed myself as well as I could. I was aided by further arming myself with knowledge about muggers tactics from stories I had found of those who had been mugged. I searched for those stories and studied them and digested them. So when the attack started I recognized it immediately and so gained an important edge: a sliver of time.
I knew that what was about to happen was the two men in front of me would distract me while the one behind came up to put a knife to my throat or a gun to my head. Having secured that overwhelming advantage, he would either kill me outright or threaten and terrify me into giving up my wallet, my book bag, and possibly my shoes too.
The adrenaline hit and, without hesitation or further thought, in my sliver of time, I executed the plan I had formed in thinking about this sort of situation beforehand. I stepped to the side of the walk, onto the grass and turned sideways, so that the two blockers were on my right and the rear man was on my left. As I did, the two blockers started their distraction routine, laughing loudly over nothing.
I lowered my head and opened my eyes wide so that I could use my peripheral vision to watch all three men at the same time. I brought my left arm up to cover my chest, using it as my shield, and slid my right hand into the opening of my book bag, which was slung by a strap from my right shoulder. In the bag I had a notebook, two textbooks, and a kukri, a large knife with an 11 inch blade, illegal to carry, I suppose, but better to be caught with it than without it.
I grasped the handle of the kukri and took a deep breath. The two blockers were still laughing because from the time I woke up and saw the attack coming in until just then was a little less than one second. The value of forethought and preparation.
My plan was to slash at the hands (the advice of Musashi) of whoever first showed a weapon in order to freeze him or drive him back. Left or right. Then I intended to pivot and slash the other way, right or left, to freeze or drive back the man or men in the opposite direction. Then I would pivot again and stab for center mass or throat of the man who had showed the weapon, and proceed afterwards as seemed best.
I guess in Cooper’s system I was at condition red. I had thought things through before and my intent, once someone showed me a weapon, was to kill all three of them, or die trying. I did NOT expect to survive the attack. As I took hold of my friend Mr. Kukri I was sure I was about to be killed, but I was also sure I could take at least one of them with me, and maybe two. It all depended on immediate unhesitating execution of the plan. Much depended on surprise, the surprise of the predators not expecting a ferocious response from someone they had mistaken for a sheep.
The thought of their surprise tickled me, and, I couldn’t help it, I smiled.
There was enough light there on that street that they saw it, they saw my smile, the two blockers did and it froze them. They cut their laughter off and ducked their heads and scurried past me. The rear man glanced back and turned and just kept going. It turned out they really didn’t want to find out what I had in my bag.
I watched them go, standing there at the side of the sidewalk and then tottered away, highly relieved tha I had NOT had to implement my plan and that I was, after all, going to survive the night.
What do we take away?
First, be situationally aware, dumbass, and don’t go wandering around with your head up your wazoo in Indian Country.
Second, arm yourself, with knowledge as well as hardware.
Third, have a plan based on that foreknowledge, and be ready to execute it without hesitation. I think it was my complete lack of hesitation, or doubt, that concentrated the minds of the muggers and caused THEM to doubt.
Fourth, smile. If the shit is about to hit the fan, you might as well enjoy yourself.
Well played Bryan. Very well played. I hoist a Guinness to you, sir.
Anyone can armchair quarterback your situation, but you executed your “plan” so the guy had to react to you. You reset his OODA Loop.
You walked away and went home to your family from a potentially bad situation. That’s a WIN.
It does not matter what this guy’s intentions were, what matters is because of your training, knowledge, and desire for self preservation, you made split second decisions which helped you throw him off of his game, and you survived the encounter. Everyone can learn from this.
Thanks for sharing your experience, and thank you for bringing us ITS Tactical.
By the way, Paul BaiLey, you hit the four bullet points right on the head.
2 stories
I had the opportunity to go on a short course in Europe with my university. Included in the trip were 2 or 3 weeks of free travel (no supervisors). This was before I really took an interest in self defense, but my dad has always been about protecting himself and his and made sure I had at least a little heads up about Europe. Our team leaders also made sure to warn us of potential threats but to a lot of young college kids in Europe, I think a lot of us were thinking about where we wanted to visit more than who to watch out for.
There were a lot of “sketchy” situations I encountered with my group in Europe, but the 2 most dangerous occurred in Rome.
Right after we got off an absolutely terrible Italian train filled with very questionable people, my group was exhausted. We were concerned about one of our team, because he was the only one he got no sleep at all. He said all he wanted was some breakfast. After getting a little something, he rejoined our group circle of about 8 people (we were trying to figure out what to do next because we didn’t even have a plan of where to stay…another genius move on our part). A gypsy woman came over and started rubbing her stomach at our group like she wanted us to give her something to eat. We were in a crowded train station and we all had our backs to her so we just ignored her (I usually try to help the hungry but not when it is going to endanger others). For some reason, our friend turned out of the circle and faced the woman, and she started talking real fast in Italian and might have even reached for his food. He then said a little loudly something to the effect of, “Woman, what do you want!” She then spit on his food and arm and walked away, and he got angry and yelled, “Are you kidding me!”
Now, I was upset that my friend was treated that way, but I was probably a little slow being so tired and what could I do. She wasn’t threatening him further and even if Italian law recognized spitting on someone as assault, we don’t know the language and I figured Roman police would have better things to deal with. Since I wasn’t doing anything, I decided to see what else was going on. I noticed several other men who were dressed very similarly to the gypsy one at different points around our group. After a little while, these men joined the gypsy woman and left. My team discussed the incident later and recognized some potential threats. The rude gypsy woman may have been just trying to get some food. However, she may have been a distraction intending to draw the whole group away from our belongings so her accomplices could relieve us of them while we were dealing with her. Maybe she intended to have one of us hit her so her team could have come in afterwards to give us all a whooping, taken are stuff, and been “justified” by self defense. Who knows. I just know that the one woman threat I originally assessed was much larger and that by focusing on that one threat, I could have opened myself to much greater threats.
The second instance also occurred in Rome. It was late at night, the last buses were pulling out for the night, and my group wanted to go to the Trevi Fountain. We had our maps out trying to quickly find which bus would take us there. One guy (passenger) leaned out of a bus and asked us in English where we were going. We told him, and he said for us to get on the bus. I had a tingle of “I don’t like this” but ignored it. We got on the bus and were on our way. Turns out he was traveling with a friend. He said that he was Egyptian but had studied in England for years (hence the English). There was another man with him but he didn’t talk much. The first guy was asking us all sorts of questions about our trip and our group, and I had slipped out of Yellow into a White color code of awareness. That friend mentioned in the earlier story was just chatting it up with them. He told them about the gypsy story and the Egyptian said, “Yeah, you just really can’t trust anybody.” This woke me up and put me in Orange. I thought, “Yeah, you’re exactly right, we can’t trust anybody and anybody includes you buddy.” So, being abroad in Europe, my carry weapons were severely limited. I had a small leatherman micra and curled my fist around that (taking out the blade would have been dangerous concealed in my pant pocket and that tiny blade is very impractical for a fight but I thought it might help a little as a fist load).
Now these guys were actually going to take us to the Trevi Fountain. An idea which had now made me very uncomfortable. I decided not to get out at any stop that look deserted. We came to a stop and they said that this was our stop. There were plenty of people around so I felt fine. Then they said that this one was actually the wrong spot and that it was the next one (now I am more uncomfortable). The next stop had less people but there were people around. We got off the bus with them and started toward the Fountain. I tried the best I could to make sure the females in our group had at least one male of our group nearby. I sized up our new “pals” and felt like our group of 5 guys and 3 girls could handle these 2 but if they drew down on us or took us down an alley where 25 of their buddies were waiting, we would be in deep trouble. Luckily, we stopped at one point to get our bearing at which point my cousin and I got our group to meet and then “wander” away from these guys. I asked who of our group knew our new friends may not have been too friendly and most were aware. However, some of our group were completely shocked and were worried about the information they gave them (hotel info, where we were going, etc.).
Luckily these were the situations that I believe had the most potential to have been serious situations in my travels. I learned some valuable lessons without a high price. Basically, be friendly but don’t endanger yourself by putting yourself in compromising situations and/or giving too much info about yourself. Also, if you are being distracted by something strange you need to ask yourself, “Why I am I being distracted?” For example, there were puppet shows from time to time on the subway in Europe. Some hope you will give them a few coins…some our hoping you will be looking their way while their friends take a lot more than just a few coins.
Trust in God, be aware, educate yourself, and do the best you can.
This post is quite timely for me, as I’ve been really thinking about this a lot lately, and particularly in the past day or so. I try to always be aware of my surroundings, what vibes I’m getting from people, and what my options are should something happen. I do, without thinking of it consciously as such, tend to think of my state of mind in terms of the color codes described in this article. My friends have often joked about it and think I’m worried about nothing or am overly paranoid. They joked about it, that is, until this weekend, when someone was robbed at gunpoint in the middle of our (generally safe) campus. Not on the edge of campus, close to town, nor in any of the quieter areas of the campus. Right in the middle of campus. Just goes to show that nowhere is safe and you can never be too aware.
Oh, and, of course, since the gunman is still at large, my friends don’t joke about my level of alertness anymore…
This past winter I was skiing with the family. My 7 year old daughter and I were in line for the chair lift. In the line near us (maybe 5-8 feet away) there was a younger boy, maybe 5-6 and he was poking at who I think was probably his older sister, teasing her, stepping on her skis, etc. He was being annoying and everyone in line was probably tired of his antics.
A male adult who he was with (I assume his father) was just standing there. All of a sudden he back hands the boy on the side of his head, hard enough to knock the boy down (the boy was wearing a helmet, but still it was a really hard hit).
Everyone else in line (including me) was just standing there with our mouths open. The boy stood up and didn’t look hurt. The guy starts yelling at the boy and my daughter looked at me and she was scared. The guy stopped yelling and I said to him that if he hit his kid like that again, I’d do the same to him. Probably not the best choice of words because he went off that I was threatening him and I couldn’t tell him how to parent, etc. Another guy in line then said something to him and the guy went completely nuts.
I figured any second somebody was going to get hit (I am a horrible skier and still had my skis on…I figured it was going to be bad).
Then bad dad puts his hand in his pocket and says he’s got a gun and he’s going to shoot us. All I could think to do was to stare him down. He wasn’t close enough for me to grab and there was no where we could move to. There isn’t a color code for “This is going to hurt and I don’t have a clue”.
Luckily, I think he was just bluffing and we were just staring at each other. He finally got out of line and left and his kids followed. Somebody must have said something or the staff saw it because before he reached the chalet, the ski hill staff stopped him and were talking to him. I talked to the guy who was running the lift and he said that they knew the guy and would take care of it. The part I regret about it is I should have called the police myself because I don’t know what ever came of it.
I would have never thought something could go so bad, so fast in what was supposed to be a friendly place. I had always figured I’d break my leg or something, not get into a confrontation on the ski hill. As often as I fall, I don’t even carry a wallet when I’m skiing, because I’m afraid of losing it. My daughter was really scared and it took us awhile to settle ourselves down, but when she later retold the story to her mom and sister, I think that she was ok and maybe even a little proud of her dad.